AJ's Cancer Journey & Chronic Illness: The pain is now unbearable!

It's now been 6 weeks since my Oophorectomy and that is nicely healed and the easiest part of my journey so far. I've had scar work therapy again by the lovely Debbie at Stables Clinic, she works wonders and my scars are all smooth now.

My problem now is the bone pain and chest pain. The chest pain is caused by my implant ports in both breasts, they're banging against my ribs, and the capsular contracture in my right breast, is so tight now it looks like it might burst! Why does radiotherapy have to keep on working!

My GP thinks my bone pain might be caused by my cancer medication Anastrozole, so I'm having a month off it to see how I am. If the bone pain eases then it's back to Oncology to try a different medication to kill all the oestrogen in my body, to prevent cancer coming beck. All cancer medication that you take for 5-10 years (after active treatment is finished) come with side effects of some kind and they nearly all can cause bone pain. But some less than others, it's just finding the right one that suits you.

A few days ago I couldn't take the pain anymore, so my GP has increased my Lyrica and put me on Orramorph (morphine). Which is great as I'm almost pain free, I just ache now, but I'm very dopey (nothing new there I here you say :-P), very uneasy on my feet and I can't drive, so it's not helping with my sanity, so stuck at home, yet again. But as always I have my work to keep me going thankfully, otherwise I don't know what I'd do. My GP told me to ease of the morphine the odd day and see if the lyrica is helping. Lyrica can still be increased more so there's hope yet.

It would be nice to get back to work in the office during the next 6 weeks while I'm waiting for my next surgery. Yes you heard right, I now have a date of 23rd September for my implant exchange and possible LD flap to make my new boob. So it's anything from a 1-2 hour operation to a 4-5! I really don't want the LD flap but needs must if i want a pair of boobs. My new plastic surgeon said I'd never have to go flat chested with him, just hope he can keep to his word! But I have been considering going flat and will do if these next two operations don't work.

Two weeks ago I managed a day out to Barefoot Festival in Loughborough with my friend Lucy. We had a great day face painting, hair braids, dancing, henna and more. I also got some new hippy clothes to cheer me up. The face painting lady even glittered up my cancer tattoo. I've also got some new hippy cushions in bright colours to go in my soon to be happy cheerful lounge.

Last weekend I watched the men dig a pond in our garden and it's lovely. Just need some plants and frogs now and maybe a few fish, can't decide.

Today I had a little walk after therapy, was great to get out in the fresh air. Can't believe I still need councelling but so glad I have that, everyone going through anything similar really should get one, it's so good to talk and let out all your emotions. Then walk away and get on with life as best you can.

My moms coming to stay next week, so looking forward to it, I miss my family. So i'm actually going to have a weeks holiday from work. Already booked us in for a manicure, looking forward to a few days out here and there, it's good she can drive and has a disabled badge because I'll need it too.

Anyway I've rambled on enough now and it's getting late. So have a good weekend. TTFN. X